Weddings symbolize the joining of two partners in marriage, ready to share in life’s ups and downs as a team. But what happens when wedding planning reveals that you have different interests, aesthetics, or priorities? How do you bridge the gap to design a wedding that celebrates each of you fully?
With so many decisions to make, from color schemes to venue choices, incorporating your and your fiancé’s interests into the wedding design is a creative and meaningful way to showcase who you are as a couple. Whether you’re blending music tastes, film genres, or preferred cuisines, finding a harmonious blend of your individual styles can set the stage for a day that truly belongs to both of you.
In any case, combining your interests shouldn’t turn into a matrimonial tug-of-war. Wedding photographer and videographer Craig Peterman encourages couples to embrace the wedding planning journey as an extension of their relationship.
“Often, I see the bride or the groom planning the wedding entirely, without enough input from both sides, which can lead to tense moments or small resentments on the day of the wedding,” Peterman shares. “This should be a fun experience shared together and a way to showcase your personalities, both together and separately.”
From blending design styles to incorporating subtle nods to your interests, keep reading to learn how to craft a wedding that celebrates the differences that make your love story one of a kind.
Talk about your priorities
Identical preferences don’t make a marriage last, but effective communication does! Wedding planning is one of the first challenges you’ll face together, so remember to approach it as a united force.
Carol Guedes of Flying Little Birds recommends starting the design process by “sharing your views, expectations, and how you envision celebrating your big day together,” ensuring both of you understand the other person’s priorities.
It doesn’t need to be a formal sit-down at the dinner table (though you’re welcome to open a bottle of wine!). House of Joy’s Samantha Leenheer suggests treating it like a casual interview with a loved one.
“Gather all the details you could possibly pull from,” she says. “Think of asking about your favorite places to shop, go-to foods, best beverages, and even questions like how you want guests to feel at your wedding.”
You’ll likely find plenty of overlap between your preferences, but don’t shy away from the differences! Those make your relationship unlike any other, so that’s where you can lean in and find a happy balance between the two of you.
Jen Sulak of Weirdo Weddings encourages couples to keep an open mind, even when disagreements arise (and they will!). “One of you may feel stronger towards your ideas than the other; let it be what it needs to be,” she urges. “Don’t force something to happen. The simpler you keep it without forcing someone to conform, the more fun the designing process can be to include you both!”
Once you’ve worked through your preferences and ideas, it’s time to move on to the fun part: bringing it all to life with meaningful details that honor each of your interests.
Blend interests with a destination wedding
Many couples find a destination wedding the perfect middle ground to merge their design styles. Since you’ll travel to a new place, you get to choose a destination that marries your interests — and you get a vacation out of it, too!
For example, “If one is a beach lover and the other is a history buff, we recommend getting married in Tulum, Mexico, where you can walk down the aisle with your toes in the sand and then take a tour of ancient Mayan ruins nearby,” says Jen Avey of Destination Weddings Travel Group.
Likewise, if you’re trying to blend the preferences of an adventure lover and a beach bum, “an all-inclusive resort could be the perfect fit,” Avey adds. “There’s a spa and endless opportunity to relax by the beach or pool, and also plenty of excursion/watersport activities to keep you entertained.”
When you broaden your horizons to consider overseas destinations, you’ll have an easier time finding the perfect location to fit both parties’ expectations for a dream wedding.
Embrace creative subtlety
Your interests don’t have to be a loud, splashy part of your wedding design to make an impact. In other words, there’s no need to be heavy-handed with themed elements unless you want them to be a big part of your design.
“Your hobby or interest does not have to be super literal or obvious when represented in a theme or decor,” confirms Katy Padilla of Scarlet Rose Events. “Consider incorporating small elements and simple details in your table decor, guest favors, menu cards, table numbers, etc., that subtly nod to those interests that are special to you and your partner.”
Wedding photographer Rachel Maloney agrees that “the best way to combine interests is mainly in the little details rather than the larger ones.” Think “fun matching socks or ties for groomsmen and even unique earrings for bridesmaids,” she offers.
Other fun, low-key ways to tie in your interests include wedding invitations, day-of signage, song selections, ceremony readings, and signature cocktails.
Here’s another cute idea: Mary Angelini of Key Moment Films recommends “placing an ‘easter egg’ (a hidden secret feature or message) into the cake” to tease a special interest or hobby. “Incorporating hidden elements like initials, a paw print, or a ‘hidden Mickey’ can give a nod to the couple’s unique interests.” Bonus points if you surprise your partner with it when it comes time to cut the cake!
If you ascribe to a “go big or go home” approach, have at it! But if you prefer a wedding design that doesn’t feel too thematic, don’t be afraid to infuse your personalities through small, subtle details throughout the day.
Design a custom emblem
What better way to blend your interests than with a custom design? While initial monograms have a long history in the wedding industry, graphic designers have gotten more creative with custom wedding logos that capture the essence of your joining.
“I have seen clients incorporate their quirks into their wedding designs and invitations by camouflaging them into the backgrounds or through monograms,” adds Loni Peterson of LP Creative Events. “For example, if you love dinosaurs, we can create a negative space design that, from a distance, looks artistic, but up close, people can decipher the dino!”
Kelley Nudo of Momental Designs agrees, noting that a custom monogram crest can be carried through the stationery and decor for a consistent wedding design.
“The monogram crest can essentially serve as branding for the wedding,” she explains. “It can also pay homage to the interests of the couple. We have created custom monogram crests that include food icons, beach imagery, and even the couple’s pets. The options are limitless when choosing personalized elements.”
The best part? Your custom emblem design will last long past your wedding! Once you’re married, you can incorporate it into your home decor, stationery, and other areas where you want a sweet reminder of your big day.
At first glance, merging two distinct sets of preferences might seem daunting — especially if your tastes differ significantly. However, with the right professionals in your corner, pulling off such a feat is easy! Seasoned vendors have encountered various styles, themes, and challenges, giving them the expertise to handle whatever your big day requires. In addition to experience, look for excitement from your wedding team.
“Find a planner who is excited to bring your ideas to life and help you create a compelling wedding creative brief with an inspo board,” urges Vijay Goel of Bite Catering Couture. “You need a planner and venue that are excited about creative concepts and have a flexible approach that allows for interesting elements to be expressed.”
As you plan your wedding, blending your interests into the design is a thoughtful way to celebrate your individuality and the life you’re building together. Hire the right vendors, communicate often, and remember — your wedding marks the beginning of a lifelong journey in marriage, so start it off on the right foot!
Meghan Ely is the owner of wedding PR and wedding marketing firm OFD Consulting. Ely is a sought-after speaker and a self-professed royal wedding enthusiast.
